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Sunday, July 22, 2012

Dear Baby C,

Sometimes I feel like because I only lost one baby out of three that I didn't have time to  properly mourn her loss. I needed to be strong for baby A (Olivia) and baby B(Charlotte)...and I was trying to stay positive...yes, I lost one but I still have two babies that are doing well...but I think about her all the time. With their 1st birthday approaching I've been thinking about her a lot...I'm no counselor but I thought maybe writing her a letter telling her how I feel and how much we all love her will help me cope. So here goes....

Dear Baby C,
First of all, I'm so sad that we never named you...we only knew you existed for such a short amount of time and we were in so much shock that names weren't something we were thinking about...we just wanted you and your sisters to be healthy.
I want you to know that I did everything I could to keep my body healthy for you... the doctors said you weren't doing well so I ate healthy and I rested when I felt tired. I never missed a prenatal vitamin and I prayed soooooo much for you. I rubbed my belly and told the three of you to please stay strong because I wanted to meet all of you.
I often wonder what you would look like...your sisters, although identical, look so different to mommy and daddy. I'm sure you would have been just as beautiful with your curly crazy hair. I wonder if you would be sweet like Olivia or crazy like Charlotte. I wonder if you would be a momma's girl like Charlotte or a daddy's girl like Olivia.
I hope you know how much you are loved even though we never met you on earth... we LOVE you so much...the girls don't know it yet but they do! 
I can't wait to one day tell your sisters about you. And sometimes I'm jealous that they got to meet you in the womb and I didn't. Silly mommy. I know they will miss you just as much as I do. Our family will never forget you, baby C.  You will always be a part of us. We love you and we can't wait to one day meet you in heaven.

Love, Mommy

3 comments:

  1. Oh Michelle. What a sweet letter to your little C. You are such a great mommy and sweet C is watching y'all everyday.

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  2. So so so sweet. Totally had me in tears. You are an amazing mama. I think you should give Baby C a name~ because she will always be a part of you. *hug*

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  3. I am so sorry for your loss. It doesn't matter how early or late you loose a child, loosing a child is a loss. Sounds like your family has some great beliefs and morals to help you through this kind of thing. I really do believe you will see Baby C again some day :)!

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